THE SILLY OX..........by Bob Smith 
Wednesday, April 7, 2010, 01:31 PM
Posted by Administrator
A client, years ago...when I was still doing the whole lawyer thing...told me that her daughter was reading a book titled THE STUPID OX. The girl said to her mother...more or less... "They shouldn't call the ox the "s" word, they should call the ox silly."

It is common in divorces for the other spouse (not you...your husband or your wife) to ...intentionally or not...get little kids involved in the case.
-"Tell mommy you would rather be with me."
-"Daddy drinks like a fish."
-"Mommy is sleeping with the mailman."

There is the great temptation to say to the kid: "Your mother/father is an idiot for involving you in our divorce case. And what she is telling you about me isn't true. She is a liar.""

But, there are two problems with this:
1) It is not helpful to the kid's psyche to dump on them. It is your mess, not their's.
2) If things get rough and some kind of mental health professional is hired to evaluate the kid, he or she will come to court and tell the Judge what you said to "fix" things after your spouse upset the kid. And "Your daddy is a liar." is maybe not the best thing you could have said.

But, on the other hand, we all are silly, sometimes. Parents are silly. Judges are silly. Kids know about silliness. And you don't need to explain the real facts to the kid because:
-It isn't their business.
-They know more about what is going on than you do, anyway.

If the mental health professional comes to court and testifies that your child told him/her that you said "Even adults can be silly sometimes....daddy was just being silly." to try to fix the situation the evil spouse created, the Judge will just smile and nod and think to him/herself that calling the other parent silly was probably a good way to dance around the issue.

After all, even Oxes are sometimes silly.
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